Friday, June 3, 2016

I Am Struggling

Sometimes I get so frustrated with myself. I packed up and left my family and friends behind. I moved into the most beautiful home. If I would have designed a home for our needs right now in life ~ it would be this home. Why can't I shake this sadness? It is only three hours away from home. For Pete's sake~ missionaries move to the other side of the world to follow God's will. I miss my people and my favorite places. 

When I search God's Word this morning I am reminded of King Asa. When he led the people to obey God, he was blessed. But when he got full of himself  and did it his own way, his reign was then marked with war and illness. Sometimes it is easy to look at this story and jump to conclusions. Is this the way God always works? The prophet Hanai told King Asa that God would strengthen the hearts of those who truly followed him and committed to obeying Him. 

2 Chronicles 16:9

 For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward him. Herein thou hast done foolishly: therefore from henceforth thou shalt have wars.

I need my heart strengthened today. Why? Because sometimes doing the will of God requires a big dose of courage and persevering . I hear the words to Toby Mac's song~ Keep Walking~ playing in my head. We have to keep walking with Jesus even when it seems like chaos. 

The will of God may not always be easy. Poor Job lost it all. Why? Because he was blameless and upright. Jeremiah was beaten and put in shackles. His crime~ telling God's rebellious children the truth. Joseph was falsely accused of attempting to rape the ruler's wife and then thrown in prison for years so that he could do God's will. His crime was being a man above reproach. 

Making the right decision at times comes with a cost. I am keeping it real today. I am struggling but God is still on the throne. His ways are not my ways. In due time, He will reveal His agenda to me. For now, I will keep on walking and say thy will be done.



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